yeah it's 1am on a Saturday and i'm posting a blog. WHAT OF IT!?

It's a Saturday night and I'm at home posting a blog complaining about pretty much everything and I know that's not going to do wonders for my credibility/popularity but I was amazed tonight at how GROSS going out can be sometimes, how little imagination the general public seem to have and how dumb most people are as a rule.

I'm laying down some ground rules for myself re: future social activities...
1. Will only enter club type atmosphere if I'm getting paid to do so, i.e. dj'ing
2. Will enthusiastically attend house parties, particularly if there is the promise of food or cake
3. Will have more house parties at own amazing house with amazing boyfriend and amazing housemate, is good as means do not have to be concerned with travelling home after drinking as have not left house
4. Will NOT line up to get in anywhere, is simply not worth it, ever
5. Will always buy self chocolate on way home from night out (as have done tonight) to congratulate self on leaving house

I'm really only interested in old person activities these days like taking baths and complaining.

Fingers crossed I'll brighten up when I finish my thesis.

Jessie out.

making plans

Last night I dreamt that I finally had my own sausage dog and he was so naughty. We were riding the lifts in our apartment building and he kept running out just as the lift would close then I'd have to search around to find him. Is it possible to really love something that doesn't exist yet? Because I love my future puppy so much it's a bit of a joke. I imagine that Hans (that will be his name) will look a little like one of these dogs:

o hai! wearing a little jumper!


possible future hans running:




I also imagine that Halloween will be heaps funner when I have a puppy. Must stop googling 'dogs in costumes' 24/7.
Yes! FUCKOFFTOOCUTE!


hilarious dog expression. this costume demeans us both.


awesomest but impractical:


also must start brainstorming halloween costume ideas for self and not just for imaginary dog. so far i am leaning towards a bunch of grapes, a hot dog or a cheese slice. i have sourced costumes for all these ideas and they are all pretty stupid/awesome.

Top 5 Monday Morning Sad Bastard Songs

1. 'I'm on Fire' Bruce Springsteen
2. 'Thirteen' Big Star
3. 'Ceremony' New Order (Joy Division Cover)
4. 'Daniel' Bat for Lashes
5. 'These Days' Nico

everyone's your friend

kitto's pretty street


go <3 your own city:


dinner with banner, always a pleasure:


gitane:


magnolia red velvet:


inferior hipster cupcake:


so excited about my post-cupcake frozen margerita that i'm doing my quasimodo impression. later i fell into a sugar coma:




Williamsburg is so effing cool that Tism perform at the local church, just before confession:


karaoke night of doom:




a class act:


kitto, if this is the way home, why are we suddenly at the Hudson?


this photo:


led to this injury:


best photo of me ever taken? yes:


just two pals, taking one thousand photos of themselves on the street:


balloon head ear tweak:


jules has a girls bike:


post-brunch, inappropriately drunk, about to go to airport:


looking back at these it's amazing i'm not fat/dead.

srsly. pretty funny.

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there is no photo today because today is the last day and i spent pretty much all of it getting drunk

if i get married, definite honeymoon destination of choice

let's go to dubai and go on this WATERSLIDE THAT GOES THROUGH A GLASS UNDERWATER TUNNEL SURROUNDED BY SHARKS!!!!!!!!!

rhymes with fiance

happy birthday you hot bitch.
(i want to be you)

i want to go to these

don't think these won't be mine. because they will.

day 9

second to last day of thesis lockdown.

from the dark end of the street, to the bright side of the road

today was turning out to be a shit-fight of misery so i went for a long drive, went to barneys and bought an amazing cashmere jumper, went to wholefoods and ate everything i could see and took photos of my beautiful current home which is just down the road from bill and hillary - awesome.

feeling much better.



road leading down to the house:


backyard:






mister, my guard dog and the size of a bear:


the giant car i've been driving, driving in america is weird i have to keep repeating 'right side of the road, right side of the road':


i'm going to write some thesis now and later i'm going to have a spa and possibly get drunk alone.

over and out.
xx

heart palpitations

TODAY IS HARD.

my thesis has officially sent me around the twist. i am wandering around the house whimpering and keep finding myself in strange rooms, standing completely still, staring in to the distance with no idea how i got there or how long i have been there for. i have hardly slept all week. i've been eating cereal for every meal. i've had crying fits that have lasted entire days and i keep typing typing typing and crying at the same time. i've completely lost the plot. and at the end of the day i don't even think i've written as much as i should have and what i have written is probably complete rubbish.

i honestly don't know how anyone comes out of a phd alive.
i'm pretty sure this shit has taken 20 years off my life expectancy.

day 7

blergh

oh janice

it is actually ridiculous how much i love young janice dickinson.
why couldn't she have aged gracefully?

day 6

important to stay hydrated. have not washed hair in...a...really...long...time. hence, recurring headband.